My favourite song in 1979

When I was growing up we used to go camping and in the evening my brother and I would go to the amusement arcade to spend our pennies.

1979 was the year I discovered the juke box and every night I would spend some of my money playing my favourite song over and over.

I Don’t Like Mondays - The Boomtown Rats

If I ever learn to play the piano this is the song I wish I could play.  For me it brings back such happy memories.

It wasn’t until years later that Andrew told me what the song was about – a mass shooting in America, nowadays an all too common occurrence.   I was shocked once more just this morning when I heard the news of yet another tragedy at the weekend.

There are of course other songs with Monday in the title.

Rainy Days and Mondays - The Carpenters

Often played when growing up.  It expressed my mood as a lovelorn teenager!

Manic Monday - The Bangles

Anything by The Bangles takes me back to my gap year in New Zealand and my time as a student getting my degree.  

The truth is I don’t dislike Mondays at all.  I love it when I finally get the boys out of the house for school and have the place to myself.  There’s a sigh and a chance to turn up the music even louder and a just be ME!!

It is so good to finally have a complete day to myself (well until 3 when school finishes!).  A chance to set my own agenda.  I have got so much to do.  I’ve written a partial list and now I’ve circled the key things I really SHOULD get done today.  Realistically I don’t see me even getting all of these jobs done but I’m glad of the breather.

I’ve not been sleeping very well again, I thought it was getting better over Christmas and New Year but now I think it was just because I had put the LONG list on hold.  Now it’s going round and round my head.

For all I’m happy to share my life with you on this blog I’m also a private, independent person and want to do everything myself.  I am asking for help and getting better at it but some decisions need to be taken on my own.

What I have done today is sort out some of Andrew’s clothes to take to the church charity shop tomorrow.  Can I hear some tutting?  People give such conflicting advice and I’m sure there are some of you wondering at my wisdom.  While others are wholeheartedly supporting me.

It’s something I feel able to do and it’s another tick on my list.  I haven’t chucked it ALL out.  I’ve kept the really special items.  Really I’ve only gone through the sweatshirts, there’s still Tshirts and shirts to sort through.  I’ve just picked out what I know will sell at this time of year.  Ever practical!

When my Grandad died I inherited one of his shirts and a cardigan.  The cardigan had already seen better days and was darned at the elbows.  There is a photo of my Grandad wearing it on my mantelpiece.  I wore it as a student until the day I didn’t want it any more.  It no longer held any emotional attachment and I was able to throw it away.  I dithered a couple of times, with the cardigan held over the rubbish bag but finally I was ready to let go.

When Andrew’s brother was visiting after Christmas I offered him and my grown up nephews a look in the wardrobe to see if there was anything they wanted.   None of them took me up on the offer although my sister-in-law took a couple of sweatshirts she’d never seen Andrew wear and said she’s hide them with Andrew’s brother’s clothes.  So maybe one day he’ll be wearing one when I see him and it will make me smile!

What also made me smile this morning was listening again to Manic Monday by The Bangles.  There’s a line in it that says

it takes me so long just to figure out what I’m going to wear

Andrew would be sniggering at that one!  He always said I took too much time on that decision.

Well today I’ve got on an old shirt of his with his big baggy jumper over the top.

It’s a day to be me, and a day to move on.

A day to remember and a day to smile.

It’s a Monday, it’s rainy and it’s manic. 

 I have sooooooo much to do but somehow I have to keep moving forward.